Monday, April 13, 2009
I found out I was pregnant Friday before last. I didn't want to post anything about it till I was further along. I'm pretty sure I was about 4 weeks along. This weekend I started spotting a little and it got real heavy last night. I've been having a lot of cramping as well. I'm pretty sure I've lost the baby. I called the doc this morning and am still waiting to hear back from them. My heart hurts so bad that I've lost my new little baby. I know it hasn't been confirmed by a doctor, but I just don't feel like I'm still pregnant. I don't understand why this would happen. I've had two perfectly healthy babies, why would I lose this one. My heart hurts so bad right now. I know that I was only pregnant for a short while, but it was still my little baby to me. I was already picking out names and thinking about new baby clothes. I could see that new baby being born, me holding and nursing it, loving it... I could see it growing older and running around playing with Tad and Lexie. Maybe they'll tell me at the doctor that everything is ok. Maybe I could have a miracle. Maybe my little baby is still in there growing. I wanted this baby so bad. It just doesn't make sense why this happened... Please pray for me, my heart is breaking.